chapters.

Lately I have been reminded of different chapters in my life, all of different lengths - one 3 months, one 6 months and one 2 years. And what I've discovered is this: each of these times I was having the time of my life! But did I think that while I was living them? Nope. If I go back and read blog and journal entries I'm sad or looking forward to something better or wishing this and that were different (often related to body image).
And you know what? That's dumb.

I'm glad I mostly remember off-hand that it was a happy time, that despite the heartbreak some of these periods ended in, it was all-in-all a great experience.

A couple of months ago Nora Ephron (You've Got Mail, Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally) passed away, now I did not know her personally but a lot of celebrities I follow on Twitter did, and one quote that I loved by her that someone posted was this:

“Oh, how I regret not having worn a bikini for the entire year I was twenty-six. If anyone young is reading this, go, right this minute, put on a bikini, and don't take it off until you're thirty-four.” 

 While I am not going to run around in a bikini, I did take it to heart to be more comfortable in my skin in general. And this has led to thoughts of being more happy now. Especially at this already fleeting time of my life of raising babies. I want to live fondly now and look back fondly later. 

Now I know this is hard sometimes, like when you've been driving to Yosemite for 5 hours and you get there and your baby decides to throw up everything she ate that day all over her new car seat and its 8 o'clock and your tired and hungry and you just want to rest and not clean it all up. aaah, motherhood. 

Luckily I can already laugh about this. 

But just like I miss running on the boardwalk in Huntington Beach or that time I drove halfway to Vegas because I was young and we were bored and angry and we could. I will miss having to eat cold food and sit on the ground because that's where my baby is. 

Live for now.